Peace and Light - Shelby Leonhard

One of my closest friend's stepfather was in the military years ago. He had the chance to talk with the base's medical examiner one day. Her stepfather couldn't understand why anyone would want to go into such a depressing and horrifying line of work. He asked the doctor what motivated him to do what he did on a daily basis.

The coroner related why he worked in his profession in these terms. He held up both his hands as though he wore surgical gloves.

"This is my house," he said. "Everyone has one. The human body is the house for your soul. Whenever I enter someone's house, I am very respectful. I must go in to find out how and why they left. And if I'm lucky, I can learn something that may help others stay in their houses a bit longer."

Shelby Leonhard could no longer stay in her house. She died today with her family around her.

Today we received email from a few sources in and outside the company about the news. My company will have the blood drive on March 3rd, in Shelby's memory, and hopefully help those in need of blood donations.

Not everyone knew Shelby personally, but her presence is felt in many places. Tonight I went to my cardio kickboxing class and happened to get to the exercise room a few minutes early. There was a new student talking with Sherian, our instructor. They were discussing how the gym needed to get better boxing bags.

"I wasn't going to come tonight," the woman told Sherian. "I've been upset all day and had to work it out." Her daughter was one of Shelby's classmates.

In that moment, I realized how small this big town is as far as degrees of separation of knowing people. I also understand her feelings because we've all been there.

We have all been a Shelby: a 14-year old student with aspirations of doing grand things and anxiously anticipating the next level of maturity. Driver's permit. School dances. The next big blockbuster hit over the summer.

We have all known a Shelby: a classmate who people want to be around and knows all the answers. Respectful. Likable. Studious. Fun to be around.

We have all lost a Shelby: through violence or illness or natural circumstances. A close relative. A close friend. A classmate. Old people have lived long and as the age comes closer to our own, the person becomes "so young". Shelby's category: too young.

I find grief to be more about emotional paper cuts than hemorrhages. I can't tell you how many times I've heard from friends on how traumatic they found going through their day and believing, just for an instant, that their loved one was still alive. It was as easy as turning down a familiar street or picking up the phone and absentmindedly dialing their number. The realization of this act is painful. Her loss will be felt for a long time and there will be many moments of this shared by many people.

I will close this entry with the official statement from the Leonhard family sent to us today:

Last night, our beautiful, brave and beloved Shelby went into the arms of God. It was a peaceful ending in a room filled with love.

Our family wishes to sincerely thank each and every one of you for the many prayers and love you have showered on our precious daughter and our family. Please continue to pray for us, especially Barrett and Reese. Please pray that Shelby's loving soul is at peace.

We would ask also that you continue to praise God. He gave us such a precious gift and we feel privileged to have taken this journey with Shelby and with all of you. She belongs to us all, but above all, she belongs now, to God.

With all of our love,

The Leonhards

Heart Day - Shelby Leonhard

Today's Valentine's Day. Candy Day. Celebration of St. Valentine...execution of the saint or the massacre...take your pick.

This year was going to be different than just eating chocolate and making bad jokes. I planned today to donate platelets for Shelby Leonhard (please Google her for more current information).

The call had been put out in cyberspace on the 14-year old's condition: non-hodgkin's lymphoma and in need of whole blood and platelet donations. My company works closely with Shelby's father and a blood drive is being planned. I learned my blood type would be useful for platelet donation. I've never donated platelets. I called the Blood Center and made an appointment to go today after work to do it.

Oddly enough there wasn't much information on the internet about the actual process. I received a tutorial when I arrived at the center this evening:

Apheresis (pronounced a-for-ee-sis) is a different procedure from the regular whole blood donation I was used to doing. If you've donated blood at a drive or at one of the blood mobiles, you know the routine: fill out questions about your personal love life, the times and places you've traveled abroad, and your overall health. Then you have the iron content in your blood tested by a finger lancet test. If you pass, you then get to spend some quality time bleeding into a bag, squeezing a stress ball, and afterwards drink fruit juice and eat cool junk food.

Apheresis, or platelet donation, is a newer medical procedure. With a whole blood donation, gravity does the work through an IV tube into an awaiting bag. This procedure uses a computerized centrifuge where the blood is divided into various parts as it's being drawn: red blood cells, white blood cells, plasma, and platelets. For those playing the "I need to know everything" game -red carries oxygen; white fights infection; plasma brings blood take-out; and platelets clot the works.

The "screening" process is where I got disqualified. First they check a blood donor's veins to see how strong they are to withstand the process. My veins are collapsible and wouldn't be good for it. Had I passed, then I would have had a test on the amount of platelets in a blood sample. Next step would have been being connected to the machine where blood would have been drawn, centrifuged, and saline re-entered to replace the blood taken.

Those who benefit from platelet donations are patients with blood disorders or cancer, newborns, burn victims, and those who have undergone transplant or cardiovascular surgery.

My "Plan B" is to donate blood during my company's blood drive. In a show of solidarity, there have been a few blood drives this past weekend for Shelby: Children's Hospital, Ochsner Hospital, and the Plant Gallery. Even though my blood type is not compatible to give to Shelby directly, any amount of blood donated will go towards her total. In other words, for every unit she uses and gets replaced through donation is one less unit on her medical expenses. And, if it is A negative or a compatible match, it will go directly for her use.

Shelby's current condition is unknown except that she is fighting and needs help from the public to give her direct assistance and replenish the stores. Twitter and the local media have been good getting the word out. Shelby is a loving daughter, a big sister, and a student at Sacred Heart. Her father is a good man and wants her to smile again. If you can help, please do.

And for those who don't live around here, I'm sure there's a person like Shelby in your world who needs help and would benefit from your support. I can't think of a better way to show how much your heart holds than to give and not count the cost.

Happy Valentine's Day and travel light.